by Thomas Keister

So there I was, having what could by all definition be called a shitty afternoon, when the mail came. Troubles with the intro to the most recent episode of Probably Uncalled For, people griping on it, but I won't get into all that mess. Grabbing the mailbox key out of habit, I shuffled out to see who else was going to line up, via snail mail, to continue to crap all over the fuck over my day.

Let's see...student loan shit. That went right into the wastebasket, Discover would like to know if I would like a subscription, which I do not, so that drove the student loan shit deeper into the trash. The new issue of Playboy had arrived! With Olivia Munn on the cover!! Oh, Happy Day!!!

For those of you who are easily distracted by shiny things and reality fucking television, Olivia Munn is the smoking hot co-host of G4's popular Attack of the Show. And she was gracing the cover of Playboy. Maybe the day could be salvaged.

Alas, it was not to be. Other than the cover, there was only one other picture of Ms. Munn, and to be honest, it was more suited to a Maxim or a FHM. But it lacked the usual...uh, how do you say...nudity of some form or fashion. I was, to be honest, puzzled. On to the rest of her photos at Playboy.com

Fifteen more pictures with the same results. Hmmm. Something seems amok in the machine. I mean, do not get me wrong here. The cover and all sixteen pictures were fantastic. This is in no way, shape, or form a criticism of Olivia Munn. If anything, I am impressed at the level of her management. The cover and photo shoot with Playboy and not even a single nipple makes it to the public. But when you could conceivably air the cover and every single published photo from the shoot on G4 itself, it doesn't quite seem, well...Playboy enough. How many freakin Pamela Anderson spreads (heh...spread) have I bore witness to well after being over her? More than damn enough, I'll put it that way.

In the final wind-up, my day did get better, even if some things were ultimately left to the imagination...